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Hello and welcome to my blog formerly called Gypsy-K. Please note that I am only updating this blog while I am walking from Rome to Jerusalem from September 2015. My online home and permanent blog is at www.kymwilson.com.au. You can also sign up for pilgrim postcards and newsletters here. Thank you for being here and supporting my journey. With love and courage, Kym xx

Wednesday, 9 March 2011

Transition

There is immense sadness in leaving a place and people that one loves with all their heart without knowing when or if one will return. As I pack my belongings to return to Melbourne once more, my face contorts in pain, my heart is clutched by sorrow and tears stream down my cheeks. This is the transition process I go through each time I move on. I pack and cry, pack and cry as I detach my heart strings from a life I have loved and prepare to leave it all behind to step into the great unknown once more.

For me, this place is an imperfect paradise. I love its tropical seas, golden sandy beaches, hot and humid weather, stunning sunsets, flavoursome food and ripe juicy fruits. I love the ease of being here and how when I work, it doesn’t feel like work. I love how every day feels like Friday and I don’t long for the weekends. I love the diving and how easily diving can be part of my life here. But for everything I love here there is still something missing. Within me is a deep longing to fulfil a greater purpose I can’t yet clearly articulate. Here, this longing is stuck and the relationships and synchronicities to help excavate this purpose seem to be missing. And so to stay here, is to live in a paradise, unfulfilled.

My stubborn heart wants to stay here. It doesn’t want to move on or leave. But something greater than me gently pushes me on and speaks the silent truth only I can hear. And I cry. I cry tears from recognising this truth. I cry tears as I slowly and painfully untie the invisible strings that attach me to this place and time. I cry as I say what feels like final good-byes and the grief overtakes me. I cry tears into the ocean. I cry tears into my suitcase. I cry tears into my noodle soup. I cry tears onto the one I love.

For all the sadness I feel there is equal happiness and joy to be felt too. I find solace in my longing to know purpose. I find solace in my belief and trust that life always supports me. I find solace in the excitement of the unknown and the new canvas I am about to paint. Most of all I find solace in returning to friends and family whose unconditional love and support is the one constant in my life.

Monday, 7 March 2011

My Amazing Life

Some days in my life, I can’t help but feel elated from the very joy of living. This joy stems not from something specific but from all the small pieces that make up the whole of my life. My life’s not all highs but it’s not all lows either and when I average out the peaks and troughs the median line appears somewhere in the region of extraordinary on the chart of life.

I haven’t always known in a physically tangible way what I have wanted to create in my life. My first choices were made on the basis of wanting to be and feel secure. Later my choices were based on the need to be of service to others followed by the longing to be part of something bigger than me, to lead and create a better way of doing things. Currently my choices are based on the longing to see beauty in the world, to feel free and to do what I love doing.

When I look back at the course of my life, I can see how all the synchronicity has guided my life’s course this far. From leaving university studies behind temporarily, to starting a career in Financial Planning, taking on leadership roles, and then leaving a career behind and becoming a dive master and scuba instructor in Phuket. There were signs I followed and seeds that were sown. Inner whisperings and knowings and information received from others that I listened to and acted on. And on top of all this a persistent optimism and curiosity about what the unknown path could bring.

Life does not always feel amazing. Whether I am living in a tropical paradise or in a concrete metropolis, some days life feels ordinary and I wonder what I am doing and why. But if I take a breath and look closely at all the pieces of my life, sometimes with the help of the backwards-facing crystal ball, I can’t help but be amazed by all I have done, felt and experienced on the journey to this point in my life right now.

Through silent tears of joy, I whisper to the world “Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you for the extraordinary and the ordinary, the pain and the pleasure, the doubt and the hope, the connection to all and the loneliness that comes and goes. Thank you for this beautiful piece of clay to shape and mould in any way I like with all the tools on offer to create this wonderful masterpiece, my amazing life.”


Washing Elephants in Siem Reap, Cambodia
Receiving a blessing at Angkor Wat, Cambodia

Me diving in Bali

Coming back into Chalong, Phuket after another great day diving

Me fun diving at Shark Point, Phuket

My first Manta Ray, Manta Point, Nusa Penida, Bali

Sea Horse at Padangbai, Bali

Me just after sunrise at Tengerra Crater, Java, Indonesia

Stunning after sun-set at Kata Beach, Phuket

Chalong Pier at 7.45am waiting to head out on the boat diving once more

Whale Shark Number 2